Jim Florentine - Everybody Is Awful: (Except You!) - Little, Brown Book Group

Time remaining

  • -- days
  • -- hours
  • -- minutes
  • -- seconds

Everybody Is Awful: (Except You!)

By Jim Florentine

  • Hardback
  • £20.00

A rant-ish memoir by the veteran stand-up comedian and former co-host of That Metal Show Jim Florentine.

Twitter Trolls. Facebook Freaks. Instagram Exhibitionists. These are just a few of the creatures our technology-obsessed culture has spawned in its quest to simplify our lives. The madness is so universal now that everyone has dealt with it. You login to Facebook, read a stupid post, and immediately want to tell your "friend" to go have relations with himself. Sure, social media may keep us connected, but it is a breeding ground for idiots, and these idiots have crowd-sourced a storm of useless information, corny jokes, and douchebag drama that's wasting our time and screwing with our peace of mind.

Thankfully, popular comedian and television host Jim Florentine has a solution for those of us on the verge of bashing our iPhones to bits. In Everybody Is Awful, Florentine attacks awful people and awful situations with the same biting satire and cringe-worthy humor that made him famous on television shows like Crank Yankers, Meet the Creeps, and That Metal Show.

Along the way, Everybody Is Awful takes readers through the author's formative years, a time filled with rebellion and horrible behavior, to the crazy early days of his career as a stand-up comedian. Florentine also recounts how he developed an obsession with pranks that morphed into his uniquely vigilante style of comedy and made him one of the most legendary prank callers of all time.

Florentine excels at channeling the core rage we all feel at the seemingly small annoyances of life and his fans love the cathartic experience hidden within his hilarious ranting and raving, a tradition continued in Everybody Is Awful. Acting as a de facto therapist, Florentine diagnoses awful behavior, shames awful people, and offers comedic takes on how to reclaim our lives from it all.

Biographical Notes

Jim Florentine is one of the top comedians in the nation, with a massive fan base and an extensive reach into television, film, radio, and digital entertainment. He's currently the featured guest on the Opie with Jim Norton radio broadcast and the co-host for VH1's That Metal Show. He's a critically acclaimed actor, seen most recently on FX's Louie starring Louis CK, Inside Amy Schumer, and Amy Schumer's hit movie Trainwreck.

Florentine hosts a popular weekly podcast, Comedy Metal Midgets, and is a featured DJ on Ozzy's Boneyard channel on Sirius XM radio. He rose to fame with his bestselling recordings Terrorizing Telemarketers and he created and voiced the wildly popular character Special Ed for Comedy Central's Crank Yankers. Florentine won an Emmy for his work on HBO's Inside The NFL and had two Billboard top-ten comedy albums within a single year (Cringe N' Purge and Awful Jokes from My First Comedy Notebook).

  • Other details

  • ISBN: 9780306825637
  • Publication date: 15 Mar 2018
  • Page count: 256
  • Imprint: Da Capo Press
Constable

Patronising Bastards

Quentin Letts
Authors:
Quentin Letts
Constable

Shabby

Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd
Authors:
Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd

From the creators of the bestselling parodies We're Going on a Bar Hunt, The Very Hungover Caterpillar and The Teenager Who Came to Tea.Shabby - because there is no word for Hygge in English.We all know Shabby when we see it. It's that welcoming pair of pants drying on the radiator. That half-mouldy, but perfectly gin-and-tonic-worthy lemon on display in the fruit bowl. That tin of plum tomatoes in the cupboard with a sell-by date of 1983. It's never dusting higher than your tallest friend's line of sight. But Shabby is more than just an attitude; it's a quintessentially British way of life, tried and tested for generations, and founded on the Four Central Pillars of Shabbism, Messiness, Dilapidation, Clutter and Bodged Works.Being Shabby is about spending less time fussing and clearing up and getting stressed out about stuff that doesn't really matter anyway. And more time hanging out with your family and friends. It's a celebration of a life that is neither tidy nor empty, but rather one that is splendidly cluttered and full.Shabby - because life's just too bloody short to waste time striving for perfection, or caring too much about what other people think about you and yours. Instead of worrying about what could be, it's time to start celebrating what actually is.Praise for The Very Hungover Caterpillar'Hilarious and painfully accurate, The Very Hungover Caterpillar is liable to be one of those parodies that becomes more famous than the original' IndependentPraise for We're Going on a Bar Hunt'. . . a parody that will draw a smile from any parent' Guardian Praise for The Teenager Who Came to Tea'A hilarious parody of a much-loved children's book and a perfect read for anyone who remembers the original, or has ever been a teenager or is the parent / grandparent of a teenager today' gransnet.com

Constable

The Teenager Who Came to Tea

Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd, Gillian Johnson
Contributors:
Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd, Gillian Johnson
Constable

50 People Who Screwed Up Scotland

Allan Brown
Authors:
Allan Brown

To be Scottish is to have a lot to live down, and as Allan Brown shows, this lot do the job superbly. Whether it be Robert Burns, indecipherable bard of rustic gibberish or Sean Connery, die-hard advocate of a country he refuses to live in.Or, Alex Salmond, the chortling bullfrog of separatism or Tommy Sheridan, the sexy socialist hardliner. They're all here, and many others; a veritable embassy of bad ambassadors.50 People Who Screwed Up Scotland is a humorous and chronologically-sequential series of essays, histories and anecdotes that consider those episodes and occurrences in Scotland's political, cultural and social story where, against all odds, defeat was plucked from the jaws of victory.

Constable

The Very Hungover Caterpillar

Emlyn Rees
Authors:
Emlyn Rees

'Hilarious and painfully accurate, The Very Hungover Caterpillar is liable to be one of those parodies that becomes more famous than the original.' IndependentIn the gloom of the room, a fully dressed man lies on the sofa. The next morning, the TV comes on and - ugh! - ! up lurches a thirsty and very hungover caterpillar. From the bestselling authors of We're Going on a Bar Hunt, comes another hilarious parody of a much-loved children's book. This time, we follow the quest of one man as he attempts to shake off his hangover, through eating whatever he can get his hands on, and annoying his family in the process. The perfect book for anyone who fondly remembers the original, but has now grown up and knows all too well just how painful hungover days can be . . .

Constable

Jedburgh Justice and Kentish Fire

Paul Anthony Jones
Authors:
Paul Anthony Jones
Constable

Something Nasty in the Slushpile

Sammy Looker
Authors:
Sammy Looker
Robinson

The Mammoth Book of Losers

Karl Shaw
Authors:
Karl Shaw
Constable

Wow I'm A Genieous!!!!

Mike Haskins
Authors:
Mike Haskins
Constable

The Digested Twenty-first Century

John Crace
Authors:
John Crace
Constable

And Gazza Misses The Final

Rob Smyth, Scott Murray
Authors:
Rob Smyth, Scott Murray

Classic World Cup clashes brought to life and re-evaluated by two of the writers of the popular Guardian minute-by-minute football blog. Watching each match in real time and reacting to the twists and turns of the action, Murray and Smyth bring you the real stories of the matches as they happened, not the highlights package or rose-tinted version. From the crowd swarming over the pitch moments before the Brazil-Uruguay classic of 1950 kicked off, to the dubious refereeing decisions that decided England's single triumph at Wembley, this is the history of the World Cup as you've never seen it before. As well as 30 classic moments from other matches, the games given a full report include:1950Uruguay v Brazil1962Chile v Italy1966England v ArgentinaEngland v West Germany1970England v West GermanyItaly v West GermanyBrazil v Italy1974West Germany v Holland1978Scotland v Holland1982Brazil v ItalyWest Germany v France1986England v Argentina France v Brazil1990England vs CameroonEngland v West Germany1994Romania v Argentina1998Argentina v England2006Italy v Germany2010Spain v Holland

Constable

Dear Lumpy

Louise Mortimer
Authors:
Louise Mortimer
Constable

Accidental Ironman

Martyn Brunt
Authors:
Martyn Brunt

Having spent 10 years scaling the lower echelons of the sport, the time has come for one of Britain's least successful athletes to reveal all about how he got involved in all this nonsense in the first place. Marvel as he reveals: His sporting history - how being last pick at school football in the 1970s set him on course for a lifetime of being rubbish at team games. How he took up triathlons in the first place (for a bet, and the cow who made it with him never paid up). How he overcame a crippling lack of talent and a chorus of complete indifference from his family to complete 10 Ironmans, all outside the top 500 finishers. The many triathlon adventures he has experienced over the past 10 years (cow pats, Ironmans, incontinence, driving bans, broken bones, public nudity, spending entire redundancy payments on a new bike, Belgian portaloos, German knocking shops, sunburnt arse cheeks, channel swimming, fights with chavs, obsessions with weather and the nutritional value of Jaffa Cakes, 3 hour marathons, chronic dehydration and so on). The many and varied idiots he's got to know as a result of taking up the sport (aka his mates). The typical training (hell) he goes through to take part in a race given he has absolutely no ability whatsoever. How triathlons ultimately caused him to sell his Mercedes, give away his expensive suit, chuck in his job in the City and become, as his father put it, a "god-damned hippy" (A cycle path designer who owns a camper van).

Constable

We're Going On A Bar Hunt

Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd, Gillian Johnson
Contributors:
Emlyn Rees, Josie Lloyd, Gillian Johnson
Robinson

The Mammoth Book of More Dirty, Sick, X-Rated and Politically Incorrect Jokes

Geoff Tibballs
Authors:
Geoff Tibballs

Funny, fearless and absolutely filthy-nearly 3,000 more uncensored, dirty, sick, and deeply politically incorrect jokes, covering just about every topic imaginable, from adultery to (sex in) Zoos, including an assortment of bad taste lists. A worthy, all-new follow-on to the first bestselling volume.

Constable

EUrrgh!

Mark Leigh
Authors:
Mark Leigh

What's wrong with Europe?Ignoring the fact that the EU is a grotesque, officious money sucking totalitarian machine that devours national sovereignty and pukes out unwanted, unwelcome and intrusive legislation, there's a whole variety of other reasons including:Shops that open at 10am and close at 4pm - with a two-hour lunch break in between.Oompah bands.Restaurant staff with the manners of a gibbon and the sense of urgency of a sloth.Parisians.Police forces who are the bastard offspring of the Gestapo and the Stasi.The whole concept of 'mañana.'National costumes that are as preposterous as they are pointless. Polish spelling.Drivers who view speed limits as targets rather than warnings.Yodelling.Bouzouki music. Street signs that are a homage to small typography rather than an actual guide to your location.Donkey abuse.Women who act under the misguided idea that armpit hair is remotely sexy.The 24hr clock.Using a comma as a decimal point.Father Abraham and the Smurfs.Eurodisco.Eurozone.Eurotrash.Eurovision.Anything else preceded by the word 'Euro' (apart from Euro sceptic).The Cheeky Girls. This is less of a guidebook and more of a warning...

Constable

The Art of Sledging

J Harold
Authors:
J Harold
Corsair

The Education of Hyman Kaplan

Leo Rosten
Authors:
Leo Rosten

Leo Rosten wrote his first tale of Hyman Kaplan when he was 24 and it was published to great applause by the "New Yorker". Over the next two years the magazine ran all 15 of the original stories that were eventually published in 1937 as "The Education of Hyman Kaplan".

Corsair

The Return of Hyman Kaplan

Leo Rosten
Authors:
Leo Rosten
Robinson

1001 Really Stupid Jokes

Mike Phillips
Authors:
Mike Phillips