Tom Holt - Valhalla - Little, Brown Book Group

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    • ISBN:9781841490427
    • Publication date:03 May 2001

Valhalla

By Tom Holt

  • E-Book
  • £P.O.R.

From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett

As everyone knows, when great warriors die their reward is eternal life in Odin's great hall - otherwise known as Valhalla.

But Valhalla has changed. It's grown. It's diversified. Just like any corporation, the Valhalla Group has had to adapt to survive.

Unfortunately, nothing could have prepared it for the arrival of Carol Kortright, one-time cocktail waitress, currently dead, and not at all happy.

Sparkling comic fantasy from one of Britain's sharpest, funniest writers.

More information on this book and others can be found on the Orbit web-site at www.orbitbooks.co.uk

Biographical Notes

Tom Holt's first book was published when he was just thirteen and, to his horror, he was hailed as an infant prodigy. While studying at Oxford however he discovered Bar Billiards and turned from poetry to comic fiction.

  • Other details

  • ISBN: 9780748113798
  • Publication date: 05 Nov 2009
  • Page count:
  • Imprint: Orbit
Orbit

The Management Style of the Supreme Beings

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them any more, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up.It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take Good and Evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.Unfortunately, the sudden disappearance of right and wrong, while welcomed by some, raises certain concerns amongst those still attached to the previous team's management style.In particular, there's one of the old gods who didn't move out with the others. A reclusive chap, he lives somewhere up north, and only a handful even believe in him.But he's watching. And he really does need to know if you've been naughty or nice.

Orbit

The Good, the Bad and the Smug

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

New Evil.Same as the Old Evil, but with better PR.Mordak isn't bad, as far as goblin kings go, but when someone, or something, starts pumping gold into the human kingdoms it puts his rule into serious jeopardy. Suddenly he's locked in an arms race with a species whose arms he once considered merely part of a calorie-controlled diet.Helped by an elf with a background in journalism and a masters degree in being really pleased with herself, Mordak sets out to discover what on earth (if indeed, that's where he is) is going on. He knows that the truth is out there. If only he could remember where he put it.

Orbit

The Outsorcerer's Apprentice

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

When It's A Jar

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Maurice has just killed a dragon with a breadknife. And had his destiny foretold . . . and had his true love spirited away. That's precisely the sort of stuff that'd bring out the latent heroism in anyone. Unfortunately, Maurice is pretty sure he hasn't got any latent heroism. Meanwhile, a man wakes up in a jar in a different kind of pickle (figuratively speaking). He can't get out, of course, but neither can he remember his name, or what gravity is, or what those things on the ends on his legs are called . . . and every time he starts working it all out, someone makes him forget again. Forget everything. Only one thing might help him. The answer to the most baffling question of all. WHEN IS A DOOR NOT A DOOR?

Orbit

Doughnut

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

The doughnut is a thing of beauty. A circle of fried doughy perfection. A source of comfort in trying times, perhaps. For Theo Bernstein, however, it is far, far more. Things have been going pretty badly for Theo Bernstein. An unfortunate accident at work lost him his job (and his work involved a Very Very Large Hadron Collider, so he's unlikely to get it back). His wife has left him. And he doesn't have any money. Before Theo has time to fully appreciate the pointlessness of his own existence, news arrives that his good friend Professor Pieter van Goyen, renowned physicist and Nobel laureate, has died. By leaving the apparently worthless contents of his safety deposit to Theo, however, the professor has set him on a quest of epic proportions. A journey that will rewrite the laws of physics. A battle to save humanity itself. This is the tale of a man who had nothing and gave it all up to find his destiny - and a doughnut.

Orbit

Life, Liberty And The Pursuit Of Sausages

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Blonde Bombshell

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

May Contain Traces Of Magic

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Open Sesame

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

There was something wrong! Just as the boiling water was about to be poured on his head and the man with the red book appeared and his life flashed before his eyes, Akram the Terrible, the most feared thief in Baghdad, knew this had happened before. Many times. And he was damned if he was going to let it happen again. Just because he was a character in a story didn't mean that it always had to end this way. Meanwhile, back in Southampton, it's a bit of a shock for Michelle when she puts on her Aunt Fatima's ring and the computer and the telephone start to bitch at her for past misdemeanors. But that's nothing compared to the story that her kitchen appliances have to tell her.

Orbit

Wish You Were Here

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Abacus

Olympiad

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Expecting Someone Taller

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

All Malcolm Fisher did was run over a badger. Unfortunately the badger turned out to be Ingolf, last of the giants. With his dying breath he reluctantly gave Malcolm two gifts of power and made him ruler of the world. Other work by the author includes Ye Gods! and Grailblazers .

Orbit

Who's Afraid Of Beowulf?

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

The last Norse king of Caithness, Hrolf Earthstar and his 12 champions are woken from a centuries-long sleep when an archaeologist finds their grave. He decides to carry on his ancient war against the Sourcerer-King, and must face such perils as BBC film crews and the Bakerloo line along the way.

Orbit

Odds And Gods

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Djinn Rummy

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

When Kayaguchiya Integrated Circuits III, a genie, is released from the aspirin bottle he's been stuck in for 14 years, there's bound to be trouble. Jane had wanted to end her life in peace, but now she's got a genie, things look up - until the apocalypse rears its ugly head.

Orbit

My Hero

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Paint Your Dragon

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Only Human

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Something is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things?A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition - not to mention the lemming condition - is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.

Orbit

Ye Gods!

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

A suburban house, a child called Jason who strangles large snakes whilst still in his cot, the Olympian gods and a Girl Next Door are the ingredients of this fantasy by Tom Holt, author of Flying Dutch and Expecting Someone Taller.Being a hero bothers Jason. It's easy to get maladjusted when your mum's a suburban housewife and your dad's the Supreme Being. It can be a drag slaying fabulous monsters and retrieving golden fleeces from dragons, and then having to tidy your room before your mum'll let you watch Star Trek .

Orbit

Overtime

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Guy is a Mosquito pilot in World War II. He is surprised when his dead co-pilot apparently starts speaking to him as they are flying over Northern France. And before you can say Bomber Harris , Guy finds himself caught up in time and travel, a search for Richard the Lionheart and a damsel.