Tom Holt - Paint Your Dragon - Little, Brown Book Group

Time remaining

  • -- days
  • -- hours
  • -- minutes
  • -- seconds

Paint Your Dragon

By Tom Holt

  • E-Book
  • £P.O.R.

From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett

One moment Bianca's sculpture of St George is lacking just the final touches, the next, it's lacking a dragon. This is only the first step in a fight between good and evil, involving some heavyweight gamblers, a time entrepreneur, a dragon, St George, and some hideous but endearing demons.

Biographical Notes

Tom Holt's first book was published when he was just thirteen and, to his horror, he was hailed as an infant prodigy. While studying at Oxford however he discovered Bar Billiards and turned from poetry to comic fiction.

  • Other details

  • ISBN: 9780748113651
  • Publication date: 01 Oct 2009
  • Page count:
  • Imprint: Orbit
Orbit

The Management Style of the Supreme Beings

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them any more, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up.It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take Good and Evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.Unfortunately, the sudden disappearance of right and wrong, while welcomed by some, raises certain concerns amongst those still attached to the previous team's management style.In particular, there's one of the old gods who didn't move out with the others. A reclusive chap, he lives somewhere up north, and only a handful even believe in him.But he's watching. And he really does need to know if you've been naughty or nice.

Orbit

The Good, the Bad and the Smug

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

New Evil.Same as the Old Evil, but with better PR.Mordak isn't bad, as far as goblin kings go, but when someone, or something, starts pumping gold into the human kingdoms it puts his rule into serious jeopardy. Suddenly he's locked in an arms race with a species whose arms he once considered merely part of a calorie-controlled diet.Helped by an elf with a background in journalism and a masters degree in being really pleased with herself, Mordak sets out to discover what on earth (if indeed, that's where he is) is going on. He knows that the truth is out there. If only he could remember where he put it.

Orbit

The Outsorcerer's Apprentice

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

When It's A Jar

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Doughnut

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

The doughnut is a thing of beauty. A circle of fried doughy perfection. A source of comfort in trying times, perhaps. For Theo Bernstein, however, it is far, far more. Things have been going pretty badly for Theo Bernstein. An unfortunate accident at work lost him his job (and his work involved a Very Very Large Hadron Collider, so he's unlikely to get it back). His wife has left him. And he doesn't have any money. Before Theo has time to fully appreciate the pointlessness of his own existence, news arrives that his good friend Professor Pieter van Goyen, renowned physicist and Nobel laureate, has died. By leaving the apparently worthless contents of his safety deposit to Theo, however, the professor has set him on a quest of epic proportions. A journey that will rewrite the laws of physics. A battle to save humanity itself. This is the tale of a man who had nothing and gave it all up to find his destiny - and a doughnut.

Orbit

Life, Liberty And The Pursuit Of Sausages

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Polly, an average, completely ordinary property lawyer, is convinced she's losing her mind. Someone keeps drinking her coffee. And talking to her clients. And doing her job. And when she goes to the dry cleaner's to pick up her dress for the party, it's not there. Not the dress - the dry cleaner's.And then there are the chickens who think they are people. Something strange is definitely going on - and it's going to take more than a magical ring to sort it out.

Orbit

Blonde Bombshell

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

May Contain Traces Of Magic

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

There are all kinds of products. The good ones. The bad ones. The ones that stay in the garage mouldering for years until your garden gnome makes a home out of them. Most are harmless if handled properly, even if they do contain traces of peanuts. But some are not. Not the ones that contain traces of magic.Chris Popham wasn't paying enough attention when he talked to his SatNav. Sure, she gave him directions, never backtalked him, and always led him to his next spot on the map with perfect accuracy. She was the best thing in his life. So was it really his fault that he didn't start paying attention when she talked to him? In his defence, that was her job. But when 'Take the next right' turned into 'Excuse me,' that was when the real trouble started. Because sometimes a SatNav isn't a SatNav. Sometimes it's an imprisoned soul trapped inside a metal box that will do anything it can to get free. And some products you just can't return.

Orbit

Open Sesame

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

There was something wrong! Just as the boiling water was about to be poured on his head and the man with the red book appeared and his life flashed before his eyes, Akram the Terrible, the most feared thief in Baghdad, knew this had happened before. Many times. And he was damned if he was going to let it happen again. Just because he was a character in a story didn't mean that it always had to end this way. Meanwhile, back in Southampton, it's a bit of a shock for Michelle when she puts on her Aunt Fatima's ring and the computer and the telephone start to bitch at her for past misdemeanors. But that's nothing compared to the story that her kitchen appliances have to tell her.

Orbit

Wish You Were Here

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Welcome to your Heart's Desire. It was a busy day on Lake Chicopee. But it was an eclectic bunch of sightseers and tourists that had the strange local residents rubbing their hands with delight. There was Calvin Dieb, the lawyer setting up the property deal, who'd lost his car keys; there was Linda Lochuck, the tabloid journalist who could smell that big, sensational story; there was dumpy Janice DeWecoe, who was just on a walking holiday but who longed for love. But, most promising of all, there was Wesley Higgins, the young man from Birmingham, England, who was there because he knew about the legend of the ghost of Okeewana and what she promised. Just immerse yourself in the waters of the lake and receive your heart's desire. The only drawback was that it was Okeewana who decided just what that was . . . And it isn't always what you have in mind. Ask the ghost of Talks with Squirrels, the Indian brave who still dwells hereabouts. Or those very polite Vikings whose boat keeps on sinking.

Abacus

Olympiad

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Expecting Someone Taller

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

All Malcolm Fisher did was run over a badger. Unfortunately the badger turned out to be Ingolf, last of the giants. With his dying breath he reluctantly gave Malcolm two gifts of power and made him ruler of the world. Other work by the author includes Ye Gods! and Grailblazers .

Orbit

Who's Afraid Of Beowulf?

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

The last Norse king of Caithness, Hrolf Earthstar and his 12 champions are woken from a centuries-long sleep when an archaeologist finds their grave. He decides to carry on his ancient war against the Sourcerer-King, and must face such perils as BBC film crews and the Bakerloo line along the way.

Orbit

Odds And Gods

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Djinn Rummy

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

When Kayaguchiya Integrated Circuits III, a genie, is released from the aspirin bottle he's been stuck in for 14 years, there's bound to be trouble. Jane had wanted to end her life in peace, but now she's got a genie, things look up - until the apocalypse rears its ugly head.

Orbit

Here Comes The Sun

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

My Hero

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

This is the story of Jane, who finds the novel she is working on starts to write back. She's already realized novel writing isn't such a piece of cake after all, and the world of fiction is a far more complicated place than she ever imagined.

Orbit

Only Human

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt
Orbit

Ye Gods!

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

A suburban house, a child called Jason who strangles large snakes whilst still in his cot, the Olympian gods and a Girl Next Door are the ingredients of this fantasy by Tom Holt, author of Flying Dutch and Expecting Someone Taller.Being a hero bothers Jason. It's easy to get maladjusted when your mum's a suburban housewife and your dad's the Supreme Being. It can be a drag slaying fabulous monsters and retrieving golden fleeces from dragons, and then having to tidy your room before your mum'll let you watch Star Trek .

Orbit

Overtime

Tom Holt
Authors:
Tom Holt

Guy is a Mosquito pilot in World War II. He is surprised when his dead co-pilot apparently starts speaking to him as they are flying over Northern France. And before you can say Bomber Harris , Guy finds himself caught up in time and travel, a search for Richard the Lionheart and a damsel.