Simply the Best

Last week, David Shelley, our Paperbacks Publisher, offered me the chance to help out with a book signing during Patricia Cornwell’s current visit to the UK.

I was a Patricia Cornwell fan long before coming to work for Little, Brown. As a student of English literature, my reading list comprised such classics as Middlemarch, Nostromo, Ulysses, and so on, and while those books can be useful (doorstops, emergency toilet paper etc.), my time was devoted to far more interesting subject matter: kidnap, murder, serial killers, that sort of thing. I love the formulaic comfort of a good crime novel: flawed central character fighting for justice in a corrupt (and usually rainy) world.

And the Scarpetta novels are the whole package. You get the atmosphere and slick grit of a Michael Connelly, with the more female psychology of a Nicci French and the authentic factual backdrop of a Linda Fairstein. There aren’t many authors whose books a stingy student will rush out and buy as soon as the hardback hits the shelf. But for Patricia Cornwell I always would. Even before the age of the discount sticker. 

So for me the thought of being in the same room as the woman who created Kay Scarpetta was an exciting, even frightening prospect. Maybe that seems odd, I’m probably supposed to be much cooler about this kind of thing since starting work at a publishing company. But I can’t help it, I’m a fan. I was nervous. I was excited. When the day came I even brushed my hair.

I suppose the thing about writers who create such vivid first person characters over a long period of time is that in your mind the character and the author become synonymous. To me, Patricia Cornwell kind of is Kay Scarpetta, just as Mike Carey is Felix Castor, or Mark Billingham is DI Thorne and I think that’s why I was so excited.

I realised, as I was sitting on the number 23 bus on my way to Waterstone’s at Piccadilly for the signing, that I have never really met one of my idols before. What would it be like? What would she be like? Would I speak to her? It was weird.

Luckily, from the moment she walked in, it was clear that Patricia Cornwell is extremely cool. She writes books, she flies helicopters, and she has a sharp sense of humour you might not expect considering the dark subject matter of her writing. At one point she mentioned an interview in which she’d been asked which other novelist she would be if she wasn’t herself. The answer she’d given was JK Rowling.
  “And not for the obvious reason,” she said “not that it wouldn’t be nice to be a billionaire.”
  “Ah but JK Rowling can’t fly helicopters,” one of the publicists said .
  “She don’t need to,” Patricia said. “She’s got broomsticks.”

Meanwhile I said absolutely nothing. As it turns out, I am a full on geek fan of the worst kind: completely mute; idiot expression; useless loitering. Luckily there were a lot of books to help move and that kept me busy. 

Patricia signed over a thousand copies of Book of the Dead in about an hour. She was amazing. Didn’t stop for tea, or water - just signed.

And when the signing was done, I finally managed to summon up the courage to ask if she would sign a book for me. Well, I say ask. What I mean is, I got David to ask for me.
  “Penelope’s a big fan,” he said, presenting Patricia with a book. I shuffled forwards, hovering in awkward fashion. She glanced up.
  “How’d you spell your name?” she asked me. There was a moment’s hesitation. Penelope is quite a difficult name to spell at the best of times. Under pressure like this, I wasn’t completely sure I knew the answer. But I managed in the end.

To Penelope, it says. Best!  Maybe that’s short for Best Wishes. But it’s possible she means Simply the Best! Isn’t it?

Posted 23/11/2007 11:13:08 by Penelope Skinner with 0 comments.